Not Seeing, Yet Believing

When we were children, my friends and I used to discuss whether aliens were real. They would say it is true that they actually exist, but I would disagree and tell them I would not believe unless I would see one.

In our Gospel today, we hear the story of St. Thomas, also known as "Doubting Thomas," an apostle who did not believe that Jesus had really risen from the dead. When Jesus appeared on Easter evening, Thomas was not around, and the Twelve (apostles) were living in fear after the death of their Master. This fear is caused by what Thomas witnessed: the suffering and death of Jesus.

We can say that like the other disciples, he was also confused and uncertain of what would happen next, most especially to them, Jesus' disciples. Thus, when the other disciples told him that they saw the risen Jesus, he could not immediately accept their testimony. He said,

"Unless I see the mark of the nails in his hands and put my finger into the nail marks and put my hand into his side, I will not believe."

Yes, it is indeed hard to believe something that you can't see with your own eyes, but it is in this way that we can test our faith in the Lord. Thomas' reaction reflects our own, especially when we are experiencing something difficult because of pain and disappointment. During these moments, we are asking for signs from the Lord. The requirement of Thomas is not due to stubbornness, but is about asking for certainty in life, most especially his mission as an apostle of Christ.

The most striking thing in this Gospel story is the response of Jesus to Thomas' terms. On his second appearance, he did not rebuke Thomas for being doubtful; instead, he invited him to see his hands and touch his side.

This shows that Jesus really knew Thomas' experiences and struggles. It reveals how compassionate and understanding Jesus was.

When we are experiencing doubts and struggles, the question is: To whom can we go? In these moments, Jesus is inviting us to turn to the Holy Eucharist to experience him in our midst despite all these doubts. In this way, our faith will be strengthened by the Lord. Our authentic faith will be strengthened if we only have a strong relationship with him, most especially in the Eucharist.

Thomas had the privilege of seeing the risen Lord physically, but we are all invited to believe through the witness of Scripture, through the Eucharist, the life of the Church, and our own experiences of God's grace. Every time we are in the Holy Mass, the moment when the priest raises the bread and wine, we will also say the words uttered by Thomas before the risen Master:

"My Lord and my God!"

Let us ask ourselves:

How is my relationship with the Lord, especially during times of struggles and doubts?

Can we also make the words of St. Peter to the early Christians our very own:

"Although you have not seen him you love him; even though you do not see him now yet believe in him, you rejoice with an indescribable and glorious joy." (1 Pt 1:8)

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